Pondering Weight Loss

      2 Comments on Pondering Weight Loss

 

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I had two great runs this week, not because I ran fast or long, but because I did them with my two favorite running partners. 🙂

A week ago today, I ran 19 miles.  I ran that all by myself, and I feel like I did a great job.  There are no pictures from that run, for two reasons: 1) Because I made a conscious effort to not take breaks except at specified times (every 5 miles until 15, and then one more at 17 before finishing), and 2) because Michigan in late March is pretty drab and brown and yucky, and who wants to see pictures of that? 😉   But I ended up with a moving pace of 11:58 pace, but more importantly, my overall pace (including stops) was a 12:27–that’s the first time I’ve had an overall pace for a really long run below 13 minutes per mile ever, I think!

Although that was a good run, it wasn’t nearly as good as the run I had the next day.  Although my Sunday run was only a mile, it was great because I got to do it with my sweet son, JJ. 🙂  He has been talking about doing another 5k (he ran three last year), and he was really excited about doing the Strawberry Run in Belleville. (I don’t know if it’s because of his love for strawberries, but I suspect that helped sway him. 😉 ) On Sunday morning, out of the blue, he asked me if he could run a mile.  I said yes enthusiastically, but since he’s nine, there was no way I was going to let him do it alone.  So, although I’d just run 19 the day before and Sunday was supposed to be a rest day, I ran another mile with him.  And he did fantastic!  No complaining, no walking, no slowing down  at all!  In fact, he not only talked to me through most of the run (he’s my chatty kid ;), he even found the energy to sprint at the end. 🙂  He was quite tired when he was done!

 

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I was really proud of him for his efforts…that’s a great pace for him, especially since he hasn’t run in months!

I ran 5 miles Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, and then I got up at 3:45am (yes, you read that right) to run 8 miles yesterday before work.  Ugh!  Okay, okay, I always complain about those week-day 8-milers, and yet…the feeling I get afterwards is so awesome. 🙂  I love knowing that I’ve knocked out 8 miles before most people are even out of bed.  😉  I had a good pace, too (11:21), despite the really strong winds (15-20 mph coming from the north).

Then, this morning, I had 12 on the schedule (it’s a step-down week before my big 20-miler next week).  Jamie is training to pace me in the last leg of my marathon (5.5 miles), and he had 3.5 on the schedule as his long run this week.  So, I decided to run 8.5, and then run the last 3.5 with him. It turned out to be a great idea!  We had a really nice run, not too fast (I was rather tired after that first 8.5), but not too slow either.  Mostly, it was just nice to have some quality time with my sweet son.

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By the way, that kid turned 13 this week.

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Wow, when did I become the mom of a teenager??  I swear it was just yesterday that he looked like this:

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Awwww…he used to be so cute and sweet. 😉  He really is a great kid, though…I am truly blessed.

So, last week, I was really excited to post my weight, since I was not only down 2.6 pounds, but was also below 120 for the first time in 10 months.  I had mentioned that I was excited, but also concerned about how to maintain it.  Well…yeah, that didn’t happen.

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That’s what I weighed the next week, which was exactly where I had been two weeks prior. :/ It was like that fantastic weigh-in never happened. Boo hiss!  But, I didn’t let it get me too down.  Although I was disappointed, it led me to realize that I definitely need to modify my goal weight.  At one point, I was down to 113 for a significant period of time.  (A pretty awesome significant period of time. 😉 ) After I ended up back in the 125 range for a significant period of time, I realized that 113 was unrealistic, and then I set my sights on 115.  Now, however, my struggles in the last year have me thinking that even that weight isn’t realistic for me.  I’ve decided I’m going to aim for about 120, and let my clothes and my general overall “feeling” be my guide.  It has taken a long time for me to come to this realization, but I’ve found I’m much happier knowing I’m less than 2 pounds from my goal, versus being 5-7 pounds from my goal.

With that said, I had a kind of “a-ha” moment last night that I wanted to share.  I feel like I talk about running a LOT lately, and I don’t focus as much on my weight loss journey.  Granted, I’m training for a marathon right now, so running takes up pretty much all my time, but I know that my weight loss interests a lot more people than those who like to hear about running.  (If I had a dollar for everytime a person said to me, “I will NEVER run”… 😉 )

Sometimes, with all the struggle I’ve been having to get back to “goal” weight, I forgot that I actually have lost a significant amount of weight (80 pounds since my highest weight, as of today).  More importantly, I’m coming up on 3 years of maintaining that weight loss.  So I guess, despite all my challenges, I probably am doing something right. 🙂

Last night, I went out to dinner with some hockey mom friends.  We used to all be on the same team, but that team fell apart 3 years ago, and although we’re all on different teams now, we’re still great friends and we like to get together when we can.   We went out for Mexican, and the drinks were flowing, and I was actually the only one who didn’t have an alcoholic beverage. 😉 The reason is simple: I don’t drink the night before a long run.  They gave me some good-natured teasing, but it was all in fun.  When dinner came, I hurriedly snapped a few photos of my shrimp fajita dinner with my phone before I dug in.

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I know those aren’t the best food pics, but they did the trick.  A few moms questioned why I took pictures of my food, and I explained that I do that so that I can track it later; I’ve discovered I don’t estimate portion sizes well by memory, and I often forget some of the nondescript sides.  I was asked if I still did Weight Watchers, and I told them I do.  That led to a discussion of weight loss programs and techniques, and a few moms mentioned that they should probably “go back to Weight Watchers” or “give that a try,” since they were struggling with weight.  They said it as though my successful weight loss affirmed that Weight Watchers was “the” solution, but I was quick to point out that my experience with Weight Watchers spanned 25 years, most of which had been unsuccessful.  I explained that it wasn’t until I finally got serious about it, and stopped doing it as a Monday-Friday thing, and then falling off on the weekends and “starting over Monday” that it really worked for me.  I explained that Weight Watchers was no different than any other program…you have to fully commit to losing weight and being healthy, in your own mind and heart, before anything will work.

Later, we got a group photo , of course. (I’m on the far left in back.)

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When I posted the picture to social media, I heard a number of comments around the table about how “Oh! I hate that picture! I look so fat” and “Oh, gosh, I look huge! You have to take that down!”  When I looked at myself in the picture, I chuckled because, somehow, my hips look really big (maybe it was the sombrero, lol!), but I know I’m not actually fat, so it didn’t bother me.  And that, along with the earlier conversation, made me realize how I’ve changed in the last 4 years.  I no longer worry about what I look like in pictures.  This is a crazy concept for me! I’ve spent so much of my life avoiding pictures or trying to show off my best side. Now, I don’t care–because I know I’m the healthiest I’ve ever been.  And I know that I can sustain it, because I’ve changed my habits to focus on the right things…like eating healthy foods, practicing portion control, and of course, running a lot!  My mindset has totally changed in the last four years, to the point where making good choices is almost unconscious.  I only ate 4 tortilla chips before my dinner came last night, despite the fact that the bowl was directly in front of me all night, and I waited an hour before we finally got our dinner.  Sure, I wanted more, but I knew that 4 chips was one point, and that’s all I wanted to spend on chips, because I knew I had a big dinner coming.  That kind of thinking was not anywhere in my mind 4 years ago!

It definitely didn’t happen overnight, but I’m proud to say I’ve finally figured out how to make the good habits stick.  It’s not something you can teach someone, in my opinion–everyone has to learn it in their own way.  It took me 25 years to learn it! But now that I have, I know I won’t go back.  And that, more than anything the scale says, speaks volumes about how far I’ve come.  🙂

I challenge you to think about the habits you’d like to adopt, and then–try it!  Start with one and go from there.  It’s amazing what small changes can do.  🙂

Thank you very much for reading!

2 thoughts on “Pondering Weight Loss

  1. Jenn

    You are a beautiful person, Steph, inside and out. I have come to the realization that photos aren’t the enemy. There is a Trixie friend who loves to take photos and I finally gave up at one point and realized that capturing the memories was more important than what I looked like and that being a “ham” could be fun. Of course now, there are some photos where I think I look really good. Keep up the good work and listen to your body, how you feel is more important that the number on the scale.

    Reply
    1. steph Post author

      You are a beautiful person, too! It’s funny how we learn as we get older and wiser that pictures aren’t the true measure of us! xoxo

      Reply

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